Tanso's Diary #1

Hi, I’m Tanso and I have 2 parents. I have been living with them for two years. One fateful day, I  switched homes temporarily and it all started on 25th of July 2024...

WARNING! THIS DIARY ENTRY IS LONG. IF YOU DON’T LIKE LONG DIARIES BUT IS FORCED TO READ THIS, PUT A PILLOW ON YOUR FOREHEAD IN CASE  YOU BONK YOUR HEAD ONTO THE TABLE AS YOU ARE ALLERGIC TO LONG DIARY ENTRIES.

25 July 2024

I was lying on my FAV blanket when my mother tried to drag me away from my blanket. I was like, “HISSSSSS!!” Basically that translates into ”I DO NOT WANNA GO!” But she obviously did not understand and still dragged me. I meow annoyingly while looking at her but she still doesn’t know I’m saying! I give up and sigh. She puts me into something even worse than a jail cell, aka THE BAG OF DOOM! Whenever I go into that bag I either go to 2 places, either the vet where they poke you with the sharp thingy, or a random place which is at least a new place to explore. I cross my hands; oops, I mean paws- wishing that I don’t go the vet.

I get pushed into the bag, and get carried to this machine which is like a rollercoaster, but just that humans use it to get around anywhere, called a car. As we start the treacherous ride, the car immediately stops. I immediately get pushed back In the bag. I almost go like 360 degrees! But obviously nobody cares.

Grrrrr…

The same thing happens again and again. So annoying... when we  finally arrive I look out of my bag and out of the window and is relived to see that it is not the vet.

Hew. They carry me to the gate and press a button *DING DONG!* A loud bell rings. I wince because as a cat you have sensitive ears. I do not know whether that’s good or bad. I hear clanking and it’s probably someone opening the gate. The gate swings open and there is a woman standing there wearing a black-striped t-shirt and short jeans. She happily waves at us, and gestures us to come in. I hear thumping while we are walking to the front door. I assume that the sounds  are footsteps of people. YAY, more attention to me! We are walking, and...

Hey are those fish! OMG!!

This house has a pond at the front door (like underneath) with fish swimming inside! Ohhhh, I am gonna try to catch them when they free me from this bag and let me explore later!

(Cue dramatic laugh) MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

I sound crazy… WHICH I AM! Okay, I sound mentally unstable…… We just entered the house and the first thing I see are STAIRS! I wanna go up them!!! I see a girl with her hair let down, looking down from a staircase and looking at me.

YAY ATTENTION!

But she suddenly runs down the staircase like Flash. But she doesn’t come near me! BOO ATTENTION. She goes to a level lower. Who knows where is she is going, whether I am gonna catch any fish or how many levels there are in this gigantic looking house.

The girl comes back with a middle-aged man with white and black hair. Another girl with a ponytail comes down. YAY ATTENTION! They are all staring at me, and I can tell they think I am cute.

HEHE. My cuteness has so much power!

My very cuddly and furry fur also helps. My mother sets me down on the floor, and *ZIPPPPPPPS* opens the zipper door on the bag. I practically fly out of the bag, wanting to explore this very interesting looking house. I immediately go down stairs, which lead to their dining table and kitchen. There was a island table and I jumped on it.

The human family, which also came down with my parents - probably lives here - are looking at me like they are worrying I am going to break a vase or something.

Chill, people!

I walk on the ledge which becomes thinner as I am walking beside a sink. The ledge becomes larger again as I walk past the sink. It becomes thinner again.

People! Stop changing your minds!

I walk past pots and pans. It becomes larger AGAIN. Omg, people just make up your mind! I go past a plant which smells SO GOOD! One of the family members, which I think she is the mom, winces. I can tell they don’t like me rubbing against this plant vase. So I keep on rubbing 😸!

The ledge abruptly stops and ends by a cupboard. I look up and wanna jump up. But there’s no space to land and those teapots just look very - how you would say, ya know - glassy. I jump onto the ground, wandering around. Meanwhile the family is looking at every move I make like a stalker-jeez, people, remember Tay Tay said ”You need to calm down” at least, YAY ATTENTION!

As they are eating on the dining table, I circle them. When I go near any of the family members, they would try to pet me. But me being me, duck down so they can’t pet me. After finishing their meal, they all go upstairs to the couch level (entrance level).

As my motto for life is YAY ATTENTION! I of course follow them. They use this black and squarish box to magically open the tv. My owner stands up and goes beside the TV explaining something. Hmmm… if only I could understand… I look away from the TV and move my attention to

…MY CLONE!!!!!??????

When I move, it moves too! When I raise my paw, it does the exact same thing! But only if I go near this large shiny rectangle thing my clone is there .. Hmmm this raises a memory about that one and only time I actually understood da human word. My mother was pointing  at the same large shiny rectangle thing which was very similar and saying ...

"Could I please have this mirror?”

Me going nerdy for a minute and realises that large shiny rectangle thing was probably called a mirror. I turn around and  see my ADORABLE face on the TV. Me being me, I quickly run on top of the TV stand, wondering why, no how my clone teleported to the TV. Seeing me jump on top of the TV stand, everyone is looking at me, with surprised faces and laughing. I turn around and give them the grumpy look. They laugh even more.

Grrr- I mean -Hisss!!!

I turn, so their faces are facing my backside. WOMP WOMP! Anyways, I walk to the other side of the TV and find a… tunnel I would say? Me being curious, and ignoring the phrase ”Curiosity killed the cat” goes behind the TV.

BORING!

BRUH, there is only cables and white things in this tunnel. Double bruh. No, no, no, no, no. I mean, Triple bruh. I come out on the other side, somehow appearing cute with my head sticking out of the TV and everyone laughs. Fourth bruh. Wait.How do I say the fourth bruh? Hmmmmm…

Anyways, I jump down from the TV stand. Walking or judging the house I would say? My mother is still talking. I think I feel like she is talking about me. YAY ATTENTION! I walk around. My head raised like a snobbish man.I suddenly wonder :Wait where did my clone go ?I can't see it......Not even in the mirror " Hmmmm I go near the mirror and POOF the clone appears again this is really weird....Meanwhile let's just admire my BOOTIFUL face for now .The kaypoh(nosy) humans go see me and are laughing about something ,Probably me! Oh well , at least YAY ATTENTION .They are probably just jealous of my BOOTIFUL face I repeat again .

Shortly after my owner stops talking about ... wait what was she talking about? It's probably ME they're talking about , I have three valid reasons why this is true. Number 1 : My picture was shown just now (you didn't forget right?). Number 2: Cuz I'm SOOOOOO cute .Number 3: ummmmmmmm, Yah that's it . See, three perfectly true reasons . HA ! Now you can't complain , KAREN!(Sorry if your'e not😅) Wait ...remember just about the 'bruh.' thing? Well I think the word for the fourth bruh is 'quadruple bruh.'(I know you guys scrolled back to the 'bruh. part' I can see everything ...😀)

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